Fade in
Outside salvation room - Relatively dark
Walter, a rough yet sharp teen in their prime hesitantly lingers around the stairs as he is seen visibly shaking
Cut to:
Room
Boss is seen impatiently waiting, looking over a pocket watch as he taps away
Cut to:
Stairs
Walter is seen walking towards the door as he takes his time with the steps before slowly opening the door
Room
Boss is barely seen waiting at the other end of the table as Walter slowly approaches him cautiously, unaware of the presence of another man, blending with the dark
Outside salvation room - Relatively dark
Walter, a rough yet sharp teen in their prime hesitantly lingers around the stairs as he is seen visibly shaking
Cut to:
Room
Boss is seen impatiently waiting, looking over a pocket watch as he taps away
Cut to:
Stairs
Walter is seen walking towards the door as he takes his time with the steps before slowly opening the door
Room
Boss is barely seen waiting at the other end of the table as Walter slowly approaches him cautiously, unaware of the presence of another man, blending with the dark
Walter
Room, Walter speaking, slightly shaky
Voice
(Little Shakey)
That's what you wanted, No?
Boss is slowly handed the briefcase, opening it hastily as a bright light is emitted, before closing it and slowly dropping it to his side
Walter
Voice
(Sighing Quietly)
I don't mean no disrespect when I say this, but I want out... I won't talk to anyone, I..... I just can't live with myself, I'm not built for this
A figure is seen slowly moving behind Walt as the Boss keeps eye contact
Boss
Voice
(Cold)
Thank you for you service
A man withdraws his gun from behind Walt and shoots him as the Muzzle flash lights the room briefly
Boss closes the pocket watch on the table
Cut to black:
Jackson V –
ReplyDeleteCallsheet entry – You should comment on this. Why is this important? How did you go about creating this and what is it supposed to do?
Script – Same again. What were you trying to do with the script in terms of representations? What are key lines / moments, and what was the audience supposed to get out of those moments?
If the script was your major contribution, you need to discuss it more.
What about the brainstorm? The storyboard? Did you have key suggestions at any time? What were they and how did they affect the overall product?
OVERALL: 9/20
You’ve given me WHAT you’ve done but not WHY. Remember, the blog has to show the THOUGHT that went into everything you do, not just the time and energy. Show that you know how meanings are created through the technical elements and use of film genre conventions. Quality of shot list & script is fine.
- T. Marcus